Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
