She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize