She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
