Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
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