Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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