Define "chronic" masturbator.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize