My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
