new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
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