no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
