im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
