yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize