She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He's on the porch naked. Help.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
