I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
