Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
