38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
This house was built for laser tag.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
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