I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You made out with two different species that night
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The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
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I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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