I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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