i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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