I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
