Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
