I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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