Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
