And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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