Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
