I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
