Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Randomize
