I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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