if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
