I wannas sexs uuuuu
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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