We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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