aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
