their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
What drink are we having for lunch?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Drunk is not a location!
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
