sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
