i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
