seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
