he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize