Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
