when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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