Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
