sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
