i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
