You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
last night I used snow as a chaser
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
