Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
