stop calling my apartment porn island.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
