covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
