The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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