So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize