i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
