Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
we're making bets on your personal life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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