In the future we'll all be gay
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
