Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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