oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
there is glitter all over my balls
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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